Taking The Bad With The Good

"Imrhien Fargis, you got a lotta nerve showin' your face back here."

Sonofabitch. 'Nother face I didn't warm to t' idea of runnin' 'cross while I was stuck on this Godforesaken hellhole of a rock. Moonshine Kalinakov was the local crime lord... or lady, if you could stomach t' thought of her bein' a woman, an' she had that gorram shotgun of hers leveled at my face.

Reckon I should take y'all back a spell. I never intended on comin' back to the Drift. After everything't happened, I didn't particularly relish t' thought of facin' the folks here. Some more'n others. I'd intended on gettin' myself good 'n lost in t' black, but obviously that weren't written in t' stars for me.

I met up with The Lone Reverie. Cap'n Card welcomed me back on t' crew, he knew I pulled my weight 'round  a boat. Problem was, he'd hit some good fortune and was runnin' some real legal jobs. Which meant we was 'round 'lliance more often than not. Which meant I had to lay low more often than not. Couldn't set foot off t' boat most places. Only thing there was to do was pick up a different crew in a less savoury corner of t' market.

Parted ways with The Reverie on Boros, where I'd already stashed Chrysalis 'n most of my gear. Parked my Stryker with her 'n managed to sign on with a crew. Boat weren't great, crewmates were a bunch of foulmouthed pirates, 'n I had to remind 'em more'n once 't I wasn't booty to be plundered. Hindsight bein' 20/20 an' all, reckon I maybe shoulda looked for a crew 't was more comfortable with t' idea of a girl playin' pirates 'steada just lookin' to fulfill some rape fantasy.

We ran a few jobs. I pulled my weight. An' then, we got one transportin' some of Miss Oakley's cattle off MacLaren's Drift. I weren't keen on t' idea, but a job's a job. 'Course, the Cap'n knew I'd planted down there a spell when the 12th splintered, so he sent me to negotiate for supplies. I weren't too keen on that idea either, but again, a job's a job.

It'd figure I'd walk straight into Duncan first thing. My life ain't never been what you'd call convenient. So, there I was, standin' in t' middle of t' gorram dusty street with a man I hadn't been able to come to terms with over losin', lookin' all skanky (Cap'n figured cleavage and thighs'd give me more of an advantage negotiatin'. He weren't wrong, neither.). I tried playin' it cool. It mighta worked, too.

He looked sad. May be he was sad for me. Don't rightly know, cuz I didn't wanna open up that can of worms. But I knew in that moment him and me were through on that level. Maybe he'd moved on, maybe he hadn't, but what'd been 'tween us was over and done. An' all I could help thinkin' was it was a damn shame. 'Cuz more'n anything, he'd been my best friend, and I regretted that loss more'n the rest put together. Could be maybe we'd be alright sometime in the future, we could go back to bein' friends, when all was settled and we was both more used to things bein' the way they are now. I can only hope for that. Reckon as long as he's happy, that's what matters to me.

Anyway, 'fore I go gettin' all nostalgic an' make anyone queasy, I did my job, got what we needed and hauled it back to t' boat. After that, we was all given a few hours liberty, which I used to walk 'long the river. Always did like bein' off on my own out in the wilderness. Woulda gone to church, ain't been in a coon's age, but Prosperity's religious services pretty much entailed prayin' Moonshine weren't gonna go batshit mad 'n kill us all.

I got back in plenty of time to not be called late, but no boat. What in t' hell? I marched up to stand on the landin' platform, wonderin' if'n maybe the sun hadn't got to me while I was traipsin' 'round by t' river, and could only glare up at the sky. That good for nothin' hwun dan left me to bake here on this rock. Like I said 'fore, my life ain't never been what you'd call convenient.

Up there, though, 's when I saw him t' first time. Can't say for sure what it was 'bout him, standin' there, gazin' up at his boat with this intense look of pride etched on his face, but I knew... Well, I don't rightly know what I knew, but I felt this powerful need to know him. So I complimented his boat.

Maybe she weren't much to look on, but I could hear the steady rumble of her pre-flight engines, and I knew the old girl flew true for him cuz he was lookin' at her t' way a man looks at t' love of his life. There was just somethin' 'bout a man 't stuck by his boat, even if she was fallin' apart, 't appealed to me. But it were deeper 'n that, too. Somethin' 'bout him caused somethin' in me to resonate.

His name was Iskrin. Ain't rightly sure if'n that's his first or last name, but it didn't much matter to me in that moment. His voice flowed like the smoothness of satin on satin, even as we stumbled through that first conversation. Everythin' in me screamed to reach out 'n touch his mind. I yearned to know him, to feel what he was feelin', to think what he was thinkin'. But I couldn't. I'd sworn to myself I wouldn't use it, I wouldn't open my head up like that 'gain so maybe nobody else could break in an' control me like Mindo had. 'Specially not for a pretty face I didn't know from Adam. But Lord, how I wanted to.

Then he left. Oddly, I felt like some part of me went chasin' off after him. Wandered down to the loadin' area, my mind full of him, and walked smack dab into gorram Moonshine, who never did seem to much like seein' me on her moon. Damn. 'S if I didn't have enough to worry on, now I had a pissed off old bitch aimin' her shotgun at my face, just to be sure I understood I was still on her turf 'n subject to her rules now't her happy little agreement with Mindo was done 'n over. I was fairly certain she weren't gonna shoot me, but it never hurts to err on the side of caution and bow 'n scrape with Moonshine, or at least acknowledge she's t' one callin' t' shots, even if she ain't. I ain't a smart woman, but I know better'n to mouth off to the business end of a shotgun brandished by a terminally cranky hag.

Some days, it just pays to stay in yer bunk. Then again... Well, thinkin' on Iskrin, I s'pose I'll take t' bad with t' good 'n call it a win.